Own Way Home

Student:  I told him he paid for the room, so he doesn’t need to let her sleep over after they….  She can fuck her own way home.

Threesome-Free

Colleague:  This is a threesome-free gaming group.

Suzanne

Man:  Nobody says no to a banana suit, unless it’s to fuck somebody hotter than Suzanne.

Matched

Me:  You haven’t changed your clothes since yesterday.
Friend:  Yeah, well, my wife said my shoes matched my shirt, so I figured I should make the most of it.

Spat

Me:  And now the space lesbians are having a spat.

Glory

Friend:  If he’s the only person in the hole, that’s fine.
Me:  One person per glory hole?
Friend:  One little person.

Penis Banana

Friend:  It was like a gold penis banana.

Scorn

Me:  Wait, they have scorn for the lonely?

Dwarf Love Day

Twelve-Year-Old:  They had the Dwarf Love Day Massacre.

Slut Shame

Friend:  Onward, ho!
Friend’s Wife:  Don’t slut shame me.