Vampires

July 23, 2018

Colleague: You should also write: “There are vampires in Transylvania, and I’m living proof!”

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Allergy

May 10, 2018

Wife: I’m going out to the van to get her allergy medicine.

Blog.

Witch-King

April 26, 2018

Colleague: Did you hear the Witch-King of Angmar pledged his company’s swords to Imrahil if he would contest with Faramir for the throne?

Admittedly, I’m associating names rather randomly, but still.
Me: Given how lost this leaves me, this is a strong candidate for the blog.

Faces

January 5, 2018

Wife: Just go ahead and send it. No demon faces!
Me: Blog.
Wife: Am I wrong? No demon faces!

Huffing

July 22, 2017

Wife: Stop huffing your stuffed cat!
Me: Blog.
Thirteen-Year-Old: I’m not huffing. I’m snorting it.

Littered

June 28, 2017

Wife: The pavement would be littered with boneless crushed dog bodies!
Me: Hold on! Hold on! Can’t blog fast enough!
Wife: Am I wrong?!
Me: No.

Worthy

March 1, 2017

Colleague: You know I try to come up with blog-worth comments.

Isopod

January 26, 2017

Friend: I got an isopod for Christmas!
Blog?

Ham

December 28, 2016

Wife: The ham I got did not have good enough statistics compared to my shovel, so….
Me: Blog.

Briefs

November 22, 2016

Wife: You have a memo book. I’ve got you two.
Me: I have it. It’s in my briefcase.
Twelve-Year-Old: Technically, that’s not a briefcase.
Me: Can I carry briefs in it?
Wife: By that logic, a plastic bag is a briefcase.

You could carry briefs in your underwear, but after you did that, nobody would want to read them.
Twelve-Year-Old: Technically, underwear is—
Me: You’re saying I could carry briefs in my briefs?