Tambo

Eleven-Year-Old:  Can’t you post this on Oliver Tambo Day?

Happy New Year!

Popes

Colleague:  Brett used to read these European history books.
Me:  Like The G—The Bad Popes.
Colleague:  Yeah, The Bad Popes.
Me:  I almost said, “The Gay Popes.”

Category

Me: What category should that go under? “Animals” and “Romance”?
Wife: “John Huss and Oliver Tambo.”
Me: “Robots” it is.

Category

Wife: You have too many things labeled “Romance” already.
Me: There are, like, twelve posts under “Romance.” It’s probably the least used category, except for “John Huss and Oliver Tambo.”

Intellectualism

Me:  I don’t know.  I think educated people should know who John Huss was.
Wife:  Well, you can help them.
Me:  Really, I also think that educated people should know who Oliver Tambo is, but I accept that they don’t.
Wife:  “Blargarrrrrrah.”  That’s all I hear when you get into your pseudo-intellectual stuff.
Me:  I am not a pseudo-intellectual.  I am an actual intellectual.
Wife:  [long raspberry]

Fans

Me:  Like my father says I’m an “Oliver Tambo fan,” he’s kind of a John
Huss fan.
Wife:  Oh.
Me:  It’s a cruel twist of fate that he’s not one of the pivotal figures of world history.  Now there’s a guy who was literally ahead of his time.
Wife:  “Literally” ahead of his time?
Me:  Yeah, “literally.”
Wife:  You mean like he was out of phase?
Me:  Exactly—like the Re’tu.
Wife:  That would explain why nobody’s heard of him then.